#Day 80: 360 Degrees Turn Around —Overcoming Ampalaya Moments (July 8,2015,Wednesday)

Bitter gourd or Ampalaya (Filipino word) is often associated with people who just moved out of a relationship. Those who can’t afford to move on are sooo much broken that they tend to be bitter and see the sky gloomy.

I had my first unforgettable “ampalaya moment” when I was in high school. My heart was bleeding, broken and so much in pain when Brian Mcfadden (Westlife’s 2nd lead) announced his wedding with Kerry Katona (Atomic Kitten). It was kinda painful to the point that I had to skip watching MTV and Channel V(LOL).

Later I realized though that I was just being a Westlife Fan, and what I felt for Brian was a natural feeling especially when I felt double the pain after learning that Brian and Kerry had divorced their marriage. After all, what I want is for Brian to spend his happiness with the person he loves the most, and during that time, it was Kerry and their children, Molly and Lilly (and I thought I was part of their family, being Ely).

In 2004, Brian made it even harder for me when he left Westlife and pursued his solo career. From time to time I’d follow him over the net and later on in social media and was thrilled when finally, he tied the knot in 2012 with the new love of his life, Model Vogue Williams.

Today though, I started my day not so brightly upon reading the official statement of Brian in his Social Media Account—- Brian and Vogue have decided to go on their separate lives. To quote:

“It is with sadness that Vogue and I have made the tough decision to go our separate ways. We will always care greatly about each other, remain friends and we wish each other all the very best for the future. We have nothing else to say on the subject and we would like to thank our friends and family for their support during this period.”

It will take a while to let go, move forward and to start anew especially if you are the type of person who gets to be too attached so hard core.

In my case, when we moved from Laguna to Las Pinas and be in a totally different environment, I had to cry for almost 2 months because I missed my friends and my school then. It was also hard to let go of my grandmother who passed away and at times, I would still feel lonely whenever I think of her.

As I mature though, l have come to accept that people come and go and that even if they leave and choose a different path, I will still be grateful to the Lord because I have met them and I have learned from them. Everything will work together for those who believe in the Lord.

Moving to another company, being in a new environment where we don’t know anyone, healing from a broken relationship, understanding people whom we trust and have left us, boybands we follow and disbanded, among others, should not in a way limit us to grow and experience the beauty that life has to offer us. It is okay to feel hurt, but not to the point of living in pain.

Sometimes, when we get too broken, we get to be in our “AMPALAYA STATE” and block off other wonderful things that we can have. When we are too absorbed with our past, we become blind of the present and just live for the sake of living. We don’t enjoy the goodness of life.

With all said and done, where do you think will “AMPALAYA STATE” lead you? Common. Don’t be bitter. Be better.

Photo credits to 


Shout out to WESTLiFE fans, let’s pray for Briand and Vogue.


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