#Day 82: From Being Hurt to Getting Even-Understanding Why Bullies Bully (July 10,2015,Friday)

Wattpad Author MjInDisguise writes about a story of a teenager who was bullied back in high school. The pain it caused him has made him think of devising a scheme against the person who caused him so much pain. However, as we go along the story, we will see that because of that incident, the lead character has become more confident of himself. Later on he will meet the same person and that’s where the excitement comes in. Now, at number 202 in Humor, When A Gay Becomes a Man,  is a story that gives a lot of point of reflection apart from the love story angle as it gives us a picture of what life can be for people who have been bullied in their younger days, good thing it gave positive change to Reycon, the lead character, but what about the others who do not have strong support system? or a family as loving as Reycon has?

I myself was kinda victim of bullying. Back then, when bullying was not a popular term or was kept in secret, we call it more of TEASING and it was only lately when I realized that I was bullied myself.  I was in grade 2 when everyday, my classmate would call me names that I didnt so much like with matching round eyes and mocking laughs. This happened every recess time or whenever we had breaks. One day, I was so fed up with what he was doing that I got the first pencil I saw and hit him. It was such a strong force that the pencil broke in two.

It took awhile before I apologized for what happened because I was guilty myself of hurting him but thank God that I did. Up until we ended the school year and until now that Im a grown up, I have not heard from him since the day I said sorry. He transferred to a different school and I did too.

American Psychological Association defines bullying as a form of aggressive behavior in which someone intentionally and repeatedly causes another person injury or discomfort. Bullying can take the form of physical contact, words or more subtle actions.The bullied individual typically has trouble defending him or herself and does nothing to “cause” the bullying.

Today, Bullying has made a cross over from the literal bullying to the internet— as social media has taken a new shape of bullying. With just one click you can HURT big time a person and yes, bullying is not limited to schools alone but even in the workplace or even in churches.

What do you do then when you experience being bullied?

Do you just stop and let it go? I’d say NOT.   You have to GET EVEN! Get even in a way that you dont hurt back and talk harshly back but rather, in times when you feel like hurting the person, pray for him or her and let God work in his/her life. You cannot change a person over night, but God can.  Ask for strength too to speak to the person, straight to his/her heart.

Try to look at the person within and not just what your “first impression” tells you.  You will never know if the person is bleeding inside too and all that person needs is someone to talk to. However, for parents whose children are experiencing bullying, find a way to get the involvement of the school and if possible, try to reach out to the parent of the other students.

For children, it is even harder to face bullying especially that we do not have full control of the internet.  This now calls for more time for families to spend quality time with each other so that children or even the youth wont end up surfing the net to the wee hours to find comfort and at the end of the day, and be bullied.  You can play chess, scrabble or bake or whatsoever. Find meaningful time with them so kids dont end up being victims of this.

For school officials, SAY NO TO BULLYING. Implement school rules that will address issues and close gaps…

So yeah. If you guys have time, do visit https://www.facebook.com/mjindisguise and https://www.wattpad.com/story/39841586-when-a-gay-becomes-a-man to know more about MjInDigsuise and his stories.

Special shout out to my friends Sky and Bee who helped me put this thing out and to my reading sister, Jean for enjoying the story with me. Until then.

Photo credits to :https://www.parentmap.com/c/51b0d6be/images/education_expo/

Read more about bullying at http://www.apa.org/topics/bullying/

For parents, read http://www.thebullyproject.com/




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